Learning to Surf
Bringing back the Johnny Boy Gomes mantra – DO SOMETHING!
So I’m sitting out in my regular lineup on a less than stellar day, where the already mediocre sets are few and far between. Finally a set peaks up on the horizon, sending me and everyone else scrambling to pick off the one decent wave of the set/hour/day. Then some turd-burglar on a longboard swings and goes for it, picking the thing off well before it breaks, while it’s still raw open ocean swell. As if that wasn’t bad enough, the guy then proceeds to ride the thing straight as a statue, all the way to the inside, his feet never varying from their initial placement, the board not moving an inch from the trim he set when popping. No board walking, no cross stepping, no stylish dropknee turns, not even a butt wiggle to remind everyone that he’s still alive. The guy looks as stoked as a stone, making the whole act incredibly painful to watch for those of us who are forced to watch it.
Don’t get me wrong. I get more than my fair share of waves. Is my surfing always pleasing to the eye? Hardly. Do I do my share of unsightly butt wiggling? Sure do. But do I approach every wave as a fresh canvas to try something, to do more than just stand there and go down the line? You bet your ass I do. So what if I eat shit and flush my wetsuit with 38 degree water while trying the umpteenth backside air of a given session. That’s the point of surfing… getting out there and doing something.
Someone correct me if I’m wrong on this, but I believe it was the legendary Johnny Boy Gomes who was famous for yelling, nay, shouting, “DO SOMETHING!” at guys who surfed it “safe”, taking the straightest line to avoid actually doing anything on a wave. While I find some of JBG’s more violent antics (mostly) reprehensible, his heckling of “safe” surfers is something that needs to be encouraged.
Next time you’re out there and some ass nugget picks off the wave of the day and surfs it “safe”, speak up, yell, scream, shout… DO SOMETHING!
Just f@cking do something!
(can you tell who missed a few good set waves yesterday?)
End rant…
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Seems like loggers get all the waves…
He probably couldn’t do anything.
wow! censorship!
That was good. I remember going to surf movies in the 70’s and when they showed a kneeboarder the whole place would yell”stand up”.Did I just date myself. oh well ,i miss the fun of an auditorium full of surfers hootin and hollerin at the screen
In the first days of US Surfing the only thing anyone was concearned about was getting tubed for as long as possible preferable doing it on the nose.Now show offs do tricks and perform for people on the beach and call that the art.Go down that rabiit hole Alice if you like but you never really will get it.
HAHA! This story made me laugh so hard! I’m just learning how to surf, so I’m always falling off - hey at least I’m doing something!