Tag Archives: surfboard

Epoxy Versus Fiberglass Tufflite Sucks etc. etc.

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Yes, we all know that Tufflite sucks etc. etc. because all of our friends say so. But if you’re not sure on whether to stick to a traditional glass board or the ceramic-feeling Tufflite, then you should definitely check out this video. Once you get over the crazy Australian accents, it’s actually pretty useful to see what these surfers say about surfboard materials and choice translated into boards. As you may know, Tufflite gets props for being super-floaty and easy to paddle, but not great if there is any kind of wind, as they tend to bob around in the water. Anyway, check for yourself here.

Intel Shows Off a Web-Surfing Surfboard

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I came across this bizarre display of ridiculous surf consumerism during a random Google search this morning.  The article was originally published by ABC News on Oct 8, 2004 …the headline screaming: “Intel Shows Off a Web-Surfing Surfboard”…a desperate attempt to save the hi-tech company from the dot.com bubble burst.  Because you wouldn’t believe me if I simply summarized what the article is about, I feel that it is necessary to paste the stupidest part of the article:

“Ralph Bond, a spokesman for Intel, says the company has helped designed a surfboard that contains a fully functional wireless laptop that would allow riders to “Surf the surf and surf the Web at the same time.”

Bond says the one-of-a-kind creation is meant “to show how wireless connectivity to the Internet is really permeating every aspect of our lives.” And while mixing the waves with the Web might sound like an ingenious idea, it wasn’t an easy task to accomplish.

Are they on crack?  “Ingenius idea?”  This is possibly the lamest attempt to make a geek brand cool – but please, don’t pull surfing into this one.   It would not have been so outrageous if they had at least used the stand up paddle surfboard as their digital dream quiver.

The Google Surfboard – Just when you thought surfing was safe from Google

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Google. It’s everywhere. It’s the tool that helps you surf the net and find great sites like DailyStoke.com (hehehe) but it also helps you find webcams and surf reports. That said, to date, Google has not invaded the surfing world. That day has come, the the first ever Google surfboard. Now, we suspect some of the folks at Google’s offices in Mountain View and Newport and Santa Monica surf. In fact, we’d be that more than a few of these geeks engineers probablly shred. That said, the Google surfboard towers above Merrick’s and the …Lost Mark Richards. Hmm.

Nice Racks!

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I don’t know about you, but I seriously had a problem sleeping at night knowing that my precious boards were leaning precariously against a wall. It grinds my gears. But you know what? I decided to make a place wear my boards could sleep at night, feel protected, and not get dinged. So I grabbed a pen and made an elaborate blueprint that was scaled down to every inch. It would serve as my guide to creating epic racks.

All you need is:
– PVC piping (I used 1 1/2 inch)
– PVC T-fittings
– One PVC 90 degree elbow
– PVC end caps or elbows
– PVC primer and glue
– Foam insulation
– Toggle bolts and/or Lag bolts (like a big wood screw)
– Piece of wood running the length of rack right below it (I used molding – you could use something like 1X3)

All of these materials are (or should be) available at your local hardware store, for under 50 big ones.

If you want to have an extensive rack that’ll hold more than three boards, you’ll need a lot of PVC pipes. I had 10 ft. of pipe and made a three-board rack.

What you want to do before you start is think about what types of boards you’ll be holding. You don’t want to make the arms of the rack 3 ft. high trying to hold a 10 ft. log. Do the math, it isn’t gonna work. I chose 5 ft as a good height as I’ll be able to put longer boards on it, but still will be able to put smaller boards on as well, although I would’ve made the arms probably 4 ft. high if I only had shortboards.

Measure the space that you want between the arms and cut accordingly, and do the same with the arms. Next, put together the pipes using the T-fittings and elbows (just like K’nex). Make sure you have all the joints lined up, and take it apart again so you can glue the pieces together, this way they won’t fall apart once you get it on the wall.

Now, tape that foam on, and measure and level out the spot where you want it on the wall. Remember that piece of wood that I listed in the supplies? Yeah, now you’re gonna nail that into that wall, this way the PVC won’t roll once it’s on the wall. Drill some holes in the PVC, and if you’re using toggle bolts it doesn’t really matter where it goes, just spread them out, and don’t thread them into a beam (that’s what the lag bolts are for!). Put on the rack right above the wood, resting on it.

That should be about it! Stick any end caps that you have on, put your boards on it and dance around! The rack arms may wiggle it bit, if they do and that bothers you, tie a string from it to the ceiling (as seen in picture)!

A Kook’s Guide to: Driving with your surfboard, without looking like a kook

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Disclaimer: This is a parody meant to be read by real surfers. But read this as if you were a clueless kook. That is the the only way that this post will be funny. You have been warned.

Unless you’re the lucky bastard who lives a stone’s toss away from the beach, most of us have to drive to get to the beach, and – most of the time – we have to bring our surfboards with us (although there is that crevice beneath the pier…). Here are some tips for you kooks for driving with your surfboard (yes, it’s possible).

1. Make sure you have roof-racks. If you don’t know why, then you’re definitely a kook. Sorry.

2. Buy a surfboard-fastening kit from your local surf-shop! Not only will you look cool driving around with the name of a surf shop on top of your car, but you’ll also be $20 poorer!

3. Fins forward and up. It’s what all the pros do (if they drive), so you should too! Wait, will that make the car try to turn around? (Gulp…)

4. Throw shakas! Everyone will think you surf if you throw shakas! Even if you suck (at surfing, that is)!

5. Park illegally. Only pansies pay for parking, right? Who cares if you get towed? People’ll think that you’re hard core! Duuuuuuuude!*

*I take no responsibility for enormous parking tickets.

Leash or No Leash…My Vote

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There are two schools of thought – or two different debates – when it comes to surfing.  One: Longboarding or shortboarding? Longboarding is better. That one’s easy.  Moving on to the second: Leash or No Leash? I thought I’d cast my vote in this debate (er, school of thought), since the first one is an open-and-closed case…right?

Here’s what I say:  if you are a longboarder who does helicopters or spins on your board nonstop, then I could see where a leash would get in the way.  And props to you.  Or a shortboarder looking to be the first to do a kickflip on a wave, then again, props to you.

However, I think most surfers should use leashes. Yeah, sometimes it’s like you are trolling for seaweed – but Hell, you barely feel the leash and it could save some serious gashes.  I’ve seen more than a few surfers paddling back to shore to recover a board that rode solo on a wave. Oh, and I’d like to keep all of my teeth.

I vote for the leash – just in case.

Obsessive Surfboard Disorder (OSD) “Oh, Snap!”

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Don’t you hate it when you buy your brand new stick, you pick it up, turn around – BAM! – you just bang the tai against the rack of boards – before you even get out of the store! Even if you can’t see any visual damage, you obsess over the trauma, and have nightmares about the “ding” letting in water. What if there’s a spider-line crack that i can’t see? Then if there is any damage, should I even fix it? and would I screw it up? Or should I just spend money for a pro to fix it (nah…). People who don’t surf don’t understand the fragility of surfboards. Just recently, while I was trying to land an old-school kickflip, the skateboard flew out from underneath and flew into my surfboards. Hopefully, there are no dings. I’ll find out when I take the wax off. (it was my new Green Room, it’s epoxy, but…). I wasn’t that bummed, because that kickflip was for the Loaded Challenge Series, and now since I’ve completed the kickflip soon after, and i’ve filmed the other challenges, i can get $100 off any loaded complete – which should be more than the price of a ding repair.

Join the Luggage Club

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You thought that the airlines have got you screwed? Think again!

I was perusing the internet, looking at some surf-site regulars when I noticed an ad to the side – the Luggage Club. Apparently, they specialize in transporting sporting goods as an alternative to checking it in as luggage at the airport. They even list surfboards on their list of transportable items! They claim that your equipment will get to its destination on time and in one piece. The fee is about the same as what airlines charge, but hopefully you won’t have to deal with replacing your new stick that you wanted to surf with in Fiji really bad.

I don’t know if what they claim is true, but if it is, It’s a serious road to take for me when I start traveling. If anyone has experience with the Luggage Club, comment below.

Baby on board? – As seen on Craigslist

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In case you were optimistic towards an opportunity to adopt, no, the baby doesn’t come with the board. When I saw this little tidbit of information on the Craigslist post, I almost cried because my hopes of being a big brother were put down once and for all. My little surfing buddy… I would rename him Todd… yeah, that just feels right. And doesn’t this little guy rip? If he was in the water he would be blowing tail, ripping face, getting tubed, and would be flashing little tiny shakas to all the open-mouthed “surfers” also out there. Seriously, I hope that this little guy will take up surfing – or maybe he’s just selling this board for an upgrade! Watch out residents of OC, don’t underestimate the skill of this new-found surfer. I swear, he’ll impress Kelly Slater.

Oh, and one more thing, if you drop in on this kid, I’ll be hearing about it.

It may tell time, but does it surf good?

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You ever thought about a way to tell time in the water without wearing a pesky watch? Me neither. Which is why I find this surfboard (or is it a clock?) quite questionable. I don’t know whether to critique it or applaud it. On one hand, it’s a frickin’ cool clock with a frickin’ cool design, but on the other hand, why not just ride it? I mean, there might be horrible de-lam on the back of something, but if it’s perfectly rideable, then I shun the person who forced this poor surfboard to sit in one place, scoring fleeting glances instead of fleeting tubes. Don’t get me wrong, I want a clock like that, I won’t lie, but at the expense of the board? No way, Jose. I’m not a surfboard killer.

I think my Bed Bath and Beyond surfboard clock will do for now.

Proof that cavemen surfed – as seen on Craigslist

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And you thought Polynesians were the first people to start the legacy of surfing! What were you thinking? All jokes aside, I’m really not sure what happened in this Craigslist offering. De-lamination? Thrown in a fire? Moldy foam? Since I can’t really figure it out, I think that it’s safe to say that this surfboard is made of some kind of buoyant rock. $25 is kinda steep, don’t you think?

Back before they invented the wheel, the cavemen saw the dolphins frolicking in the waves and said to themselves “Ugh, Uh Uh EEE!” (Translation): “I want to do that!” They tested many different stones and boulders for buoyancy by throwing them in the water. They soon realized that they all sunk. But then they realized that if they carved out holes on the inside, and stuffed them with wood, it would actually float! They then began experimenting with board design and that rocker was needed so the board wouldn’t nose-dive. (They even called it rocker. Get it? Rocker? Nevermind.) Then, they shed their cow skin and learned to surf by watching at how the dolphins would catch the waves. I can see why people thought that Polynesians were the first to surf. Through something I learned in World History called cultural diffusion, the practice of riding waves were passed on. The cavemen were, however, an inferior race, and died out before they could get credit for inventing the world’s best pastime. And yes, the cavemen ripped on short boards (easier to build). The Polynesians would tell all their friends about this new experience, but their friends were scared to try it, so they told them surfing was so easy, a caveman could do it!

Sandy, sunburnt, and soggy, this caveman was obviously a local at Bedrock Beach.

You can own your own piece of history by checking out the rock that’s on offer for $25 on Craigslist.

Aesmo’s new snowboard…

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Snowboarding just got a little bit more like surfing with this new grip tape/wax like snowboard decking. Looks similar to the bottom of a golf shoe, and grips onto the bottom of your boot. I’ve always felt that snowboarding was closer to the act of surfing rather than skateboarding, because of the rail carving aspect of it. Now with no straps connecting yourself to the board, it just got a little closer. I’m not sure how well this actually works though, and I seriously doubt it will become very successful. Snowboarding works a hell of a lot better being connected to your board. But you never know, and it’s always cool to see people coming up with new designs. It’s a major improvement on the “Snurfer” style horseshit though. Remember those things? What a joke…why do these people waste their time? I can’t stand stupid sidelines sh!t like this. Like the snakeboard skateboard, and other half-ass “extreme sports” Mountain Dew nonsense like that. It’s always some limp dick buster that can’t cut it at whatever sport he’s ripping off that comes up with this these things. Because I mean, it only takes half the talent to conquer it, and that’s exactly why everyone dismisses it as a joke. Point made: nobody is laughing at surfing, skating, or snowboarding. The Snurfer on the other hand, hilarious. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not just hating and I love to see new things. But most of the time it’s total sh!t, and if these people had just put all the time they wasted on whatever catchy name they came up with into the actual sport they’re mimicking, they might be pretty good at it, and getting tubed in Mexico.

What do you think the judges are basing the scores off of? Their haircuts? What their butt looks like in those pants?

Source.

The Environmental Risks of the Surfboard

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As surfers, we have a special appreciation and respect for the ocean. And yet, the only piece of equipment we depend on for our surfing pastime, that is, the surfboard, is contributing to the degradation of the environment. Many novice surfers don’t think much about it since they may never buy a board or they may buy one board every 5 years, but the environmental risk of surfing weighs more heavily on the more seasoned surfer who is going through a board or two a year. Good news is that there are environmentally-friendly options out there – a recycled surfboard. It would be great if recycled boards became the wave of the future.

Surf Etiquette

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Every surfer has their “war story” of some kook dropping in on them or some local terrorizing their surf session.  It sucks when it happens and it pisses us off royally.  But if we want to be honest, we’ve all done it.  Truth be told, not all violations of the surf code are intentional.  In fact, many surfers are just so damn eager to catch a wave that they completely forget that they aren’t the only ones in the water and, in the case of the beginner surfer, they may just not have control over their board.

And then there are the violations that we didn’t even realize are violations.  It’s like the guy who thinks it’s perfectly cool to floss his teeth in public or the girl at the gym who thinks that it’s acceptable to pick a zit in the changeroom mirror.  For these social barbarians, there is Emily Post;  and for those of us who are surf barbarians, there are videos like this one.  The first step to surf etiquette is awareness of what’s considered acceptable behavior when you are wading in the ocean with your fellow surfers.  The next step is to get your cocky head out of your ass and be considerate.  No one likes a jerk, particularly when you are trying to chill out with your surfboard  It’s like stressing out about getting a spot in yoga class – it’s counter-productive.

My Favorite Surfshop – Northern Light, in Bodega CA

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The Northern Light surfshop in Bodega, CA has got to be one of the most soulful sights on this coast. At one time a popular town-brothel, this eclectic building has been serving the Northern California surfing community with all of its water-related needs for over 25 years now! Whereas many surfshops specialize in clothing retail while lacking on surf gear, the Northern Light shop does not. Sure, they have a great variety of clothing, jewelry, books, DVDs, and sunglasses, but what makes this shop so great is its dedication to surfing. This shop is tailor-made for surfing addicts like you and me!

Owner, Nick Marlow, decided to open the shop at age 18 – at that time the shop was only 200 square feet. Since then Nick has pushed out the walls, expanding the space and adding the best team members to the shop. Shop manager, Sarah Molica, has got to be one of the sweetest souls in this state – if you’re having a bad day and don’t need any surf gear, just go in the shop and talk to Sarah – her vibrant personality is infectious. You’re welcome.

As a local surfer, I think the best thing about this shop is Ed Barbera. If you’re unfamiliar with Ed, allow me to introduce him to you. Mr. Barbera is a master craftsman of the art known as surfboard shaping. His resume includes shaping for labels such as Town and Country, Dick Brewer, Al Merrick, and Bryne to name a few – Ed has a history of shaping boards for many of the world’s greatest surfers, such as Kelly Slater, Rob Machado, and Tom Curren. Since January 2007, Ed Barbera has been shaping boards under the Northern Light label. Guess What! You can get a custom crafted stick from this master-shaper for an excellent price! Just contact the shop for questions or to place an order.

(707) 876-3032 or check out their website at www.northernlightsurf.com

DIY- Surfboard Repairs?

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Nothing a little scotch tape can't fix, right?

I’m not much of a hands-on person. I wish that I were-I’d rather keep my $20 for an oil change or upwards of $100 for board repairs. I never really saw my mom or dad doing home repairs or anything like that. Now, I’m the same way with everything, and it really hit me when I thought about just how much I neglect my board repairs.

I’ve gone through a couple other boards throughout the years, but my trusty first surfboard, a generic South Coast noserider, has stuck by my side-and yet I neglect her. It’s definitely a give-take relationship; I take her out but never have the decency to give up some money or time for repairs. Finally, over the weekend I found out that my neighbor was willing to repair my board so I gave her up and didn’t surf. That’s the main reason I never did-I didn’t want to wait for the work to be done and not surf.

How often does everyone repair their boards? I’m talking small dings and what not. I’m going to ask my neighbor to give me some tips, and buy a home repair kit. It’s the least I can do to show my longboard some neglected love.

Surfboard Towel – Bitchin’ or Missin’

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Missin’

I don’t think I need to justify my declaration of the surfboard towel as missin’… lame, lame and even lamer.  These girls give real surf wahines a bad name.  Maybe I am being harsh,  but sometimes ridiculous surf consumerism crosses the line from funny to stupid.  The surfboard towel makes my top ten stupid surf gear list.